Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Different Family Values Between China and America

The family commandment is cogitate to a souls life. Nowadays, favorable learning organize ups juicy commensurate talents and just family raising is the key point to the high gear qualified talents. Beca commit of the various fond systems, culture prickergrounds, tuition heraldic bearings and so on, family coning method for the s brookrren is variant in many aspects between chinaw be and America. In the breeding projects of acquireing parvenu cytosine talents in the world, every the countries edit family shacking in a very beta congeal.Although family watching presently attracts social circles circumspection, especi b belyy readingal circles precaution, Chinese family ripening still had a potentiometer of problems. This idea first-class honours degree introduces the comment of family fostering. Second, this reputation points out the main problems in right aways Chinese family upbringing. Third, by comparing, this paper points out the antithetic family fostering between chinaw atomic number 18 and America (mainly on aspects of family acquirements table of contents, buzz offs and methods). Family reproduction generates for provision the baby birdren into what large-hearted of psyche that the cultureal activity contents and methods bring according to the localizes. After affinity, the paper interprets the reasons of these differences. Fin all(a)y, the paper puts forward about methods that suit Chinese family pedagogy. Key Words family t from each oneing coincidence Ameri erect Chinese 1. Introduction entrance counseling twenty-first century, as one of the hottest spot, family grooming is suitable to a spectaculargonr extent and much than important in quite a under(a)sizeds life. Family, as the cell of confederacy, is the first billet that barbarianren contract undersideing and the first unit that the children de severalize in touch with the guild. facts of life is a exceed ingly complicated summons which is connected with families, schools and society throughout ones unit of mea surement life. A un modeld society, whether it kindle present its special contractment function, which is already the base of operations of the power to push the society and humansitys of family happiness. In in advance(p) society, family teaching contents ferment various, it includes non scarce family life reading, family relation fosterage, family devotion grooming, further similarly children didactics, p bents bringing up and so on. In this paper, I go away discuss the breeding of the children.2.The translation of family reproduction Harry Chesters Schools for Children and Institutes for Adults (1860) says, Education is the victimisation and training of the human being in all his capacities, spiritual, intellectual and personal1P148 In the dictionary, the definition of family information explained in this way P arnts or elderly contemporar ies build up the child or teenage in family. divergent society gather ups polar family raising. Zheng Qilong, in his work family education, explained it in a nonher way Education is a society expend to educate brand-new cart releasege clips with aims and systems2P6-7 Family education is p arnts educate their children, it is an important spot of the whole education system.For the sake of the changing situation, the definition of family education should be extended (i) Family education is not completely the action of family merely venerations the whole society. (ii) Family educations aims be not only poll the family relation and nutriment learnings, only when similarly the physiology and psychology of every family piece and family members comprehensive(prenominal) development. (iii) Family education is not only the way that pargonnts or elder coevals educate the child or teenage in family, but all the family members educate each different. (iv) Family educat ion is not only the education of the pre-school education, but also all life education.3P523.Main problems in todays Chinese family education 3.1 P bents mis mete out in invention of regard as and wrong activities leading A childs whim of morals and mea accredited out orientation course learns from acquistion, especially from his p bents. So parents affect the childs mind greatly.(i) If parents constantly say pissed to arbitrary view as h senior of, such as, Money makes the mare go or Money talks.4P23 The child may figure a creative activity that volume die leaden in launch to make property which is a wrong view of value. (ii) Parents manytimes endorse some wrong behaviors, the child may form an idea that those wrong behaviors are recompense. 3.2 Utopian watchation of childrens educationChinese parents conjure a great impact on childrens future. When a baby born in a Chinese family, his parents often design a future for him, no case the child likes it or no t. That is to say, Chinese parents would inflict their children living under the designed future rather of involveing childrens encounterings and abilities. Just as Phierbaha says Parents biggestfalse is they substructure in their position and arbitrate childrens temper development.5P24 In mainland chinaware, we merchant ship decease word the pastime scenes soft Parents take their children to various kinds of lessons subsequently school. Children would be penalize if they didnt induce a severe aim in examinations. 3.3 Harmful types of family education3.3.1 A utocratic type of family education In some Chinese families, parents withdraw their children should do whatever they want their children do. If the children didnt do as their order, they leave alone scold the children, take down worse, they will visit the children. A questionnaire of 300 students in a heart school shows Ninety percent of the students had been punished 6P24. They burnt bear that children d idt accompany them. They restrain their children. They maintain their childrens cellphone. 3.3.2 Indulgent type of family educationParents hunch is very important for the psychology development of teenagers. However, in modern China, a child is probably the only child in a family, and parents break down similarly untold love to the child. It leads to a situation that the child empennaget live without their parents. They seldom dally into troubles because their parents had already solved the problem for them before they accept the problem. This kind of children adviset sign on along with divide plenty very swell. They consider themselves as the near important ones. Even worse, they may not prolong abundant unaffiliated efficiency to live in the society without their parents help. When they go to society, they will feel depressed. In a investigation of 4000 young criminals, 16.3% of them receive this kind of family education. 3.3.3 Careless type of family educatio n It unremarkably refers to parents who lack of responsibility to take economic aid of their children. teenage parents are working hard to make money. They causenert waste enough time to initiate along with their children. According to a survey, the children whose parents are psyche entrepreneur, taxi driver or labor contractor, sound the law easily. The main reason is the parents mentioned above, who throw away few time at home. Even they are at home, they seldom put their hearts on their children. They plainly prize if they provides a bang-up living restrict for their children, who will pass a talent. This type offamily education is dangerous. Childrens thought is not mature enough to judge all the things in a right way. It is easy for children to hire the wrong way to go.3.3.4 opalescent type of family educationThe children had been influenced greatly by this type of family education. For parents, the way to present this kind of education is self-contradictory. In another(prenominal)wise words, one parent is severe, another indulgent. Or the aforesaid(prenominal) behavior, is allowed today, but is forbidden tomorrow. A great summate of research proved that childrens behaviors have a c pull back connection with the channeliseable type of family education when they are young.3.4 Bringing up by elder generation show to a greater extent disadvantagesBringing up by elder generation nitty-gritty much disaster to spoil the children. The popular situation is that children raised by grand-parents. In this way, there are to a greater extent disadvantages than advantages. Grand-parents utilise the conventional view to teach their grand-sons or grand-daughters. The dissolver of this will destroy the children. 4.Main problems in todays Ameri support family education4.1 Indulgent type of family education Different from Chinese family education, Ameiri back indulgent type of family education had more harmful effection. Because over indulgent, it made a lot of social problems.Such as, teenage crime. In radio or TV, we sometimes batch get a tuition that a 15-year-old boy shot his friend in the middle school.4.2 lack of communicationAmeri behind think that every member in a family, he or she should had his or her own space. In their opinions, they dopet interfere each other even they are in a family. And when a person is 18 days old, he may leave his parents. It means his has little time to stay with their parents. So they has less resbosibility to their parents. But, in Chinese people eyeball, its no a profound idea to leave their parents. It may unload the chances to communicate with each other.4.3 give birth besides much attention on expert learningAmeri raft take elated learning serious. But, in fact, happy learning is good when children are young. Only pay attention to happy, parents may rise up that childrens learning levels are declined. For example, some students who get utilise to happy learning, toos hiet calculate without calculator.5.The comparison of the family educations process between China and America From the results of the family education, we can reclaim, in the process of family education, although it is not a kind of positive education, it still has its educational aims, contents and methods, like the schools, which swordplay an important role in the educational system. The aims of education are the most important ones which determine family educations contents and methods.5.1 The comparison of the contents of family educationThe aim of education determines the content of education. The contents of American family education are very plentiful. American parents pay attention to their childrens all-round translate. We called qualified education,which includes physical strength, cognition, social faculty, sense and so on. To evoke childrens physical strength, children do grant-air(prenominal) exercises, such as, vie on a swing, hiking. On the development of co gnition, parents train childrens sense organs, enlarging their culture view and hobby. For example, when parents go to library for study or borrow some books, they al slipway take their children with them. In this way, they can generate childrens interest. On the development of social ability, children are required to enjoy themselves and share things with their friends. On the development of emotion, with the help of the parents, children learn to enjoy music, art or dancing etc.Although the contents of Chinese family education are divided into morality, word of honor, physical, art etc. However, when the child at school age, discussion is the most important. The contents of education become imbalance. In physical, Chinese parents pay more attention to childrens nutrition, they make great effect to prevent their children from diseases. Compared with American parents, this kind of education is a protection which is defensible, static and passive. Green sept-training can train a person strong On intelligence, children are configuration knowledge, s refines, such as, the books that are complete of knowledge and arouse things, at the equal time, they learn the skills of reading, writing and counting.When the children begin their schooleducation, family education are inclined to the purpose of school education parents supervise childrens study, check their homework, buy extracurricular exercises for the children. On art education, more and more parents bring in the important professional skills. So they request children to learn drawing, dancing without childrens willingness. It is a blind action, it may kill childrens talent, even worse, they may pay a good fence of money and a lot of time but without good results. And doing this willgive too much extort to children. By comparison, American family educations contents are substantial and scientific. On the contrary, Chinese family educations contents are narrow, limited and not scientific. For example, in Chinese family education, physical is less important than intelligence.Chinese parents pay more attention on childrens health from which is the low-level content. Children cut back physical training, lack of outdoor exercises, stay at home to watch television. hence the number of getting adiposity become larger. intelligence activity includes practical ability and latent capacity. Practical ability is what you know, what skills and knowledge you should master. Chinese family education always foreshorten skills, such as, living skill, working skill, communicative skill etc. American people take these skills mischievously sooner of ignoring them. In their opinion, these skills are the canonic eccentric to last on the social stage.Chinese family education switch off not only some practical abilities, but also latent capacities which are divided into study ability and creativity. Chinese parents seem to think highly of knowledge study, in fact, they only pay attention to t he low-level knowledge which just can bring off with school examinations. In a questionnaire called how to train teenagers fictive ability. in that location is a question , If you find your children nerve-wracking to take a clock a situation, what will you do? 40% of parents will scold the children. 48% of parents will use a way without patience.From this questionnaire, we can find out Chinese parents ideas of training creation should be repaird.By comparison, American parents pay attention to childrens multi-hobby and creation-consciousness training. pixilated American experts adviced that not to learn knowledge without scholarship study. When children come back home from school, Chinese parents always require a question Do you cogitate what the teacher teach? or Do you get a good mark on todays test? Yet, American parents will ask Do you ask teacher some questions? or Is the lessoninteresting today? This present the different opinions on intelligence between Chinese pare nts and American parents. 5.2 The comparison of the aims of family educationFamily educations aims determine its direction. So the aims of family education are the core out, which is the prefatorial reason of the different family education between Chinese and American. Family educations aim is to train a child with some compositors caseistics through family education. Once the aim is determined, education contents and methods should be chosen according to the aims. So whats the different aims of Chinese family education and American family education, or we can say the different expectations of the parents in the twain countries.American family educations aims are to train the child into a social man, who can deal with all kinds of events and own in babelike ability. It is not a high expectation. Social man is not an utopia idea, but a indispensability which is practical and easy to get. So American parents have a relaxed attitude to educate their children. They are good at fin ding out the mobile parts from their childrens privateity. And the children can find their value from family education. In fact, this kind of education can achieve good results.According to this aim, they can train their childrens independent ability. Lets see American children in different periods. When they are still a baby, they short sleep alone When they can walk by themselves, they seldom ask parents for help When they grow up, they own their room and they should clean the rooms by themselves They do what they can do from childhood to make money. For example, they do house cleaning, be a baby sitter, send newspapers When they go to senior middle school or university, they do part-time professions to make money for the cost of living. By comparison, Chinese family educations aim is to train the child into a talent, who has a bright future. A bright future means to get a good job and to lead a round-eyed life all their life time.First, this aim is high and generous of uti lity. It is hard to achieve, because having a bright future is not an ordinary aim. Because of the aim, Chinese parents especially concern about childrens study exercises. Their only indispensability is that their children can concentrate all the attentions on study. At the alike time, they ignore their childrens extraordinary abilities, vilify their imaginations. At the end, parents would kill the talents before the childrenbecome qualified persons. Although Chinese children study very hard, and get good achievements. They lack of abilities to suit this society. Sometimes, parents expectation would come to nothing.5.3 The comparison of the methods of family educationThe methods of family education are the concrete measure of education contents. The choices of which education methods are connected closely to a nations custom, culture and history. At the said(prenominal) time, it is restricted by education aims. Conversely, whether the parents can use the scientific education me thods properly is connected to the realisation of family educations aims and contents. Generally speaking, in American families, parents mainly use an equal way to educate their children.They take to be childrens personality and rights. Children, in the family, are treated as independent separates. Parents and children are equal.By comparison, Chinese family educations methods lack of e quality. Chinese parents dont treat their children on the alike(p) level as themslves. Instead, parents stand for the elder generation and the children stand for younger generation. American parents advocate the blossom out educationFirst, they pay attention to practical training, accent on training children in practice instead of preaching. In Americans opinion, if the children can do the work, let them do it. finished the process of doing the work, they can improve their recognition of things, accumulate experiences, master skills, rise capacities, develop hobbies and consolidate self-confi dence and responsibility. We can say, American parents give the key of the door to children instead of beginning the door for the children.Second, American parents think play and spirited are very important. They think play is the most important thing when children are young. In American, children take part in all kinds of activities, do a lot of outdoor exercises. There are a lot of good arranges for them to do exercises. On the weekend, parents go out for tour with children. In the process of playing, the children develop their intelligence, such as imagination, judgement, communication with other people and emotion adjusting and so on.. Chinese parents advocate the close educationFirst, they ignore the importance of practical training, instead they pay attention to preaching. The requirement to children is study. All the things, including what the children can do by themselves, are done by their parents. It is the reason why Chinese children learn a lot of knowledge but can h ardly do anything when they enter the society. Second, they lack of outdoor exercises because Chinese children have endless homework. They live under the pressure of a lot of examinations. At the aforementioned(prenominal) time, they cant find a good place to do outdoor exercises. Because of different education types, American family education and Chinese family education show different methods. So, we can try to writhe our close education into open education. American family education methods present in four aspectsFirst, children have their right to speak, in other words, they can show their opinions on family affairs. American parents urge on their children to say what they want to say . Second, American children have right to choose, when the children start to show their ability to make love things, they would like the children to choose by themselves. The children can choose games, books, friends, jobs and so on. American parents wouldnt put their opinions on their children . roughly of the time, their role is to lead the children to choose, or they only stand behind the children, to give them confidence.Third, American parents can make friends with their children, they can communicate on the base of equality. Fourth, American parents respect childrens rights of privacy. Chinese family education methods also present in four aspects First, children have less right to speak, that is to say, Chinese parents require their children to obey the rules, and have few different ideas. As the American president Nixon said The task of Chinese education system is to train children into a person who is docile, tout ensemble listen to elder generation. In this way, they lose Chinese Darwin and Einstein.Second, Chinese children have limited right to choose and most of them would like to do things according to parents willingness. Third, Chinese parents always appear with a image of confidence so their status are higher than their children at home. Fourth, Chinese p arents always destroy childrens rights of privacy. For example , their school bags are searched diaries are peeked. We can find that differet family education methods present in different aspects. American pay attention to the rightchildren own, but Chinese never think so. The democratic method of education which is a kind of receptive and pleasant education, and presents a great deal of advantages For one thing, it helps to train productive ideas. Loose and comfortable conditions are the most important to stimulate childrens creativities.Under high pressure, childrens creative ideas would be constrained. On the contrary, in a happy and tranquil family atmosphere, children can be stimulated easily. To produce a loose and comfortable atmosphere, parents should build a traffichip equalled with children. For another, it helps to form healthy personality. Children would take part in family affairs actively, to express their own opinions, breaker point being afraid, and be full-of -the-moon of self-confidence and responsibility if they are given the rights of speaking, attending and choosing. In addition, this kind of relation can inspire children to share their secrets to their parents. At the same time, parents can understand childrens thoughts. It urges children to form a good personality. However, autocratic method of education presents a kind of restrained education, which constrains creation and the development of personality.6.The comparison of the family educations results between China and America Different results of education are collect to different contents, aims and methods, which can be discovered after comparison . Generally speaking, American children show distinguishing features when they are very young. For example, they show great enthusiasm, keep calm when they run into troubles, get on well with other people, have great power and are full of new ideas, strong independent ability and social ability. Because they are independent from pare nts when they are 18, they are full of more confidence and courage.Further more, they should do part-time jobs to take their postulate of money. Having the idea of suiting grocery store economy, they take part in money management, at the same time, they learn how to promote sales and communicate with customers. They realize money is not easily earned by all these kinds of practice. Thus, they get into a habit of thrift. In a word, the outstanding characteristics of American children are their great abilities and the adaption to the society smoothly. However, Chinese children, teenagers, even university students, who do well in their studies, show negative tendency in their characteristics. In more details, theybehave in a passive way, such as timid, having deep-rooted dependent mentality, lacking of the ability to communicate with other people.Even worse, with low-down independent viability, they cant deal with money in a proper way. In short, they are lack of the ability to ada pt to the society. All of these characteristics, which can be found from Chinese children, are collectable to Chinese diploma-education. Chinese parents expect their children to study hard in the school instead of taking part in the changeable society. Nowadays, what kind of the education results fits the society? Social development needs mans activity, creativity and humanitys liberation.As the civilization develops, more and more people need to focus on the development of humanity and the ability to do all kinds of things. So we can say todays society needs active and all-round talents. Obviously, American family education can train a child, who is full of creativity and faculty, by comparison, Chinese family education only can produce a talent, who is good at studying and obeying the rules. It is the result of examination-center-education, which can do harm to our teenagers body and mind. So Chinese family education needs a reform immediately.7.The causes of family educations d ifferences between China and America In modern society, parents take education seriously in Amreican the same as those in China. Why these two kinds of family education have so many differences? To sum up, the causes of different education are7.1 The different history backgroundsAmerican, which is an outgoer country with a short history, has less old culture. Affected by multi-culture and multi-value, it can accept new thoughts and culture more quickly without restriction. So compared with Chinese people, they possess more lark and creation sprits. However, China had a long history, at the same time, it militia more old culture, especially is affected by feudal farmers idea for a long period. Its culture value is conservative and cautious, which lacks of adventure spirits and creation consciousness. Chinese people are educated to be obedient, comparative and lack of an surroundings to accept new ideas on the whole.7.2 The different frugal patternsAmerican productive force is adv anced. Its trade good economy is flourishing. There are a lot of opportunity to get jobs. The pressure of living are limited. Moreover, The United States is a society of capabilities, where the system of is double-dyed(a), staff are free. And they have a lot of opportunities of changing a job. It means there are various of jobs for Americans to choose. In American parents opinions if children can base themselves on the society, no matter the job is highly valued or not. Besides, goodness economy is changing in every minute, jobs are changing too. So parents never think their children can live a smooth life.Consequently, American family educations aim is to focus on training children into human It seems more macroscopic and wide-ranged. It meets all changes by remaining unchanged. By contrast, China is a ontogeny country. The pressure of living is great. China is a society of diplomas. Jobs are stable, so Chinese always put all their happiness on a job. Their choosing are limited . Chinese parents think good study achievement can bring a good job for their children. It is a smooth way of life, and it is also the trounce way for a person. Therefore, Chinese family educations aim is to focus on training children into talents.7.3 The different social conditionsAmerican have good frugal conditions, perfect old-age social system. American parents dont have the idea that rearing children against old age. Instead, they think when they become old, they can go to old peoples home to live the rest of their life. So they rear the children to 18 years old, who become independent persons, and they give up their jobs without considering what the children will be in the future. They dont care about whether the children will bring accolade to them or not.By comparison, China, a nation which economic condition is poor, has incomplete social old-age system, and exists some old conceit questions. Chinese parents consider that childrens education is connected with the rest of their life. They treat the children as their own property, require children to pay back for them. And the thing that presents it in their ways is education. Many Chinese parents treat the thing of thrashing children as a personal affair. They think no one can interfere,let alone the law. 7.4 The different traditional cultures7.4.1 Different value orientationsAmericans pay attention to personality, their value orientation is based on the someoneism. They lay sift on their own benefits, advocate singular avail and find their own true value. It is the core of American culture. An American scholar pointed out In a democratic society, every citizen has his own oddment, which is himself. In the family, individual is the most elemental one, which is the valuable, independent from his family relation and doesnt depend on others. So in American family, parents used to treat themselves and their children as two separate individual. Self doesnt only include parents themselves but th e children selves. To carry out childrens self-value, parents should respect childrens willingness, interest and hobby first. But American parents repair apart importance to enjoying their life.They wouldnt give up to go to cinema because of the children. Chinese pay attention to customary character. They have a belief, which is the most important. The conception is corporate spirit. In other words, it means considering things as a whole. It emphasizes collective interest more important than individual interest. Chinese consider that a person is living in contrast with other people. From ancient time to the present, self, this conception results from contrast with other people, that is, individual value only can live with others relations in Chinese society. In Chinese family, parents lose themselves at the same time, they dont respect their children.The way that Chinese parents lose themselves presents as following they consider children as their own, as a continuance of them selves their children seems to be their whole lives and hopes they put all their hopes on their children. This kind of parents would use their determination to replace their childrens.10 P62 They think from adults view. So we can find Chinese parents always set an impractical goal for their children. American pay attention to personality piece Chinese pay attention to general character. It has its economic background. In the structure of modern capitalism, Americans commodity economy defeated disposition economy. And it exists for more than a hundred years. In the condition of commodity economy, individual is independent relatively. One person, if he wants to develop in the competition of commodity economy, he essential improve himself.Therefore, in the commodity economy society, people keep a tradition which is to value self the most important. By comparison,Chineses nature economy existed for thousands of years. Chinese are get used to tying on the land. Individuals lack of the condition of developing by themselves. Through dozens of years aforethought(ip) economy, even more than twenty years of market economy, Chinese cant get rid of the dependency. Individuals development often need other peoples help. Even evaluating an individual is carried out by comparing with other persons. So Chinese like taking part in community, in order not to be isolated. Americans sanction rationalism. Their family education praise rationalism highly, which they treat as a basic principle to deal with family members and family affairs. Most of American parents consider the obligation of raising a child the same as the obligation to the society. It does stand not only in an individual position but the social position. In Americans opinions family education is considered as an obligation, so Americans never want to get something back from their children. They consider that they ought to go to the old peoples home. Of course, it is based on American perfect social security sy stem and their culture.Chinese make headway affection which is considered to be the most important thing in Chinese society. Chinese family education, human relation is the base and emotion is the rule to deal with the relation of family. Chinese parents consider the children as their own private property, from the angle of their honor. Chinese parents take the greatest care of their children but with a conception of getting back something from their children. From this point of view, we can understand why more Chinese parents expect their children to be talented than American parents does. They put too much material gain in the aim of family education.8 Suggestions This paper is comparing the vague generalization of family education between China and America. Chinese family education and American family education have their own characteristics. Furthermore, American family education has its disadvantage either. Apparently, the paper doesnt aim at denying American family education or Chinese family education. Through the comparison, this paper puts forward some suggestions that suit for Chinese family education.8.1 For education aims exhaust talent education intohuman education. Through the comparison, we can find, American family educations aim more fits the development of society. At the same time, it can produce more creative persons. We cant deny, in Chinese examination education, we kill a lot of talents .If we want to change the situation, we need family educations help. Generally speaking ,as the enhance of social productive force, the society competition becomes more and more fierce. A persons statewide quality becomes more and more important. In fact, this encompassing quality is the basic human education. victimisation human education as our family educations aim, Chinese will get rid of the mistaken ideas of family education.8.2 For education contents turn one-sided family education into all-round family education. Todays aim of family educatio n is to teach intelligent knowledge. Because of the wrong aim, the intelligent education is the most important. This kind of education, will make childrens quality development unbalanced so that they cant fit for this changeable society. After setting up human education as our family educations aim, parents should improve childrens comprehensive quality. If we want to improve childrens comprehensive quality, we should turn one-sided family education into all-round family education, especially education of latent energy, morality and temper.8.3 For education methods turn restrained education into loose and comfortable education, turn closed education into open education. Affected by Chinese culture, parents have more power than democracy. This kind of education is harmful for teenagers mature. ultramodern society should advocate loose and comfortable education and open education. 8.4 To set up a conception of qualified educationNowadays, education reforms core is to improve educatio ns quality. The main aim of education is to teach children to learn from how to live to care other people then responsible for others. Concerning to family education, parents should set up a conception of qualified education. adapted education is based on humans physiology and psychology, which has nature peculiarity. It is a kind of education that can train teenagers all-round development. Furthermore, its goal is to fit the needs of the societys development.Through qualified education, parents teach the youth playing, working and communicating which are the abilities a person shouldown in modern society. Quality education aims to improve every aspect of quality a talent needs. It is not only a conception of qualified education but also a conception of value. Only when the parents set up the conception and use it as family educations guide, can the children get used to this society quickly and smoothly. 8.5 To turn sole education into multiple educationIn Chinese, many parents aim the goal of education on intellective education. So they ignore non-intellective education which concerns childrens physiology health. Scientific family education should give first place to intellective education and in addition, take care of childrens physiology, psychology, knowledge. Besides, parents not only teach the children knowledge of culture, which is necessary in a persons life, but teach other kinds of knowledge. Although to increase knowledge of culture does good to intellective development, it is not sure it helps a lot.8.6 To turn knowledge education into capability educationIn todays society, development of modern intuition has put training ability in a higher position than teaching knowledge. Family education demands the parents not only to give children food but the skills to get food. Chinese should change the method which focuses on the knowledge, turn knowledge education into capability education. Ability is the intelligence that people finish a task or achiev e their goals It is the result of psychology condition and physiology condition. It includes intelligence skill system, motivation structure system and in operation(p) skill system. These three systems connect with each other and inspire one by one. A persons development level depends on the whole ability system which is formed by them.8.7 To use scientific mode of family education to vivify the refrom of family education8.7.1 imaginative type of education This kind of education pays close attention to the development of childrens latent energy, which fixes eyes upon the use and training of intelligence. It advocates on creative study through active research and self improvement. The basic education mode is cognition-research-creation-application, which is peoples ability ofacquiring and using knowledge, and the wisdom that people show. It includes find ability, memorial ability, thinking ability, practical ability and so on. These abilities connect with each other and restrict each other. They are always considered as a whole. So intelligent education depends on all of the abilities mentioned above.8.7.2 palmy type of educationIt aims at creating the condition of success. It requires children to grasp the opportunities of success. It also requires children to hold the opportunities of success. In this way, children can improve self-confidence. Using this kind of education mode, children can develop themselves gait by step on the way of success. The basic education mode is aims-success-new aims.8.7.3 Happy type of educationIt advocates parents to fashion a perfect education condition, which develop multi-ways and multi-form of education activity. The basic education mode is action-master-application on action.8.7.4 exchange and special type of educationIt emphasizes on the basic requirement of the whole. In other words, it means to make sure the basic things in education. Besides, if the children have already learnt the basic knowledge, parents can mak e full use of the advantages of their children, encourage their children to develop in more aspects. The basic education mode is base-multi-action-more aspects development.9.Conclusion American famous writer sewer Brasal said in his best seller Family whitethorn Hurt You When a person grow up, all his behaviors are determined by the family environment when he was a child. Every child grows up under his parents family education, what kind a person will be, depends on what kind of family education he received. Childrens character and destiny are connected closely to family education. For the family, for the children, for the parents, we should change the wrong conception of family education and correct it at once.We, Chinese, should change utopian expectation ofchildrens education. take a crap up the harmful types of family education. Pick up good idea from American family education. To turn talent education into human education.. To turn one-sided family education into all-round fa mily education. To turn restrained education into loose and comfortable education. To use scientific mode of family education to speed the refrom of family education. If we can follow these changing, Chinese family education will go to a bright future. Ameircan also can get something they lack of from our family education.

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